It is the middle of the night and I just had to stop and write (hey, when the thoughts start flowing you just have to roll with it!) Are you on Facebook? Instagram? Or any of the other social media sites? Do you look at everyone else and think they have the perfect life? There seems to be several different types of social media adventurists…
- The ones who LIVE on there! Yes, this is me. As I am not married and do not have a significant other with whom I can share every detail of my daily life; so therefore, I am “officially” in a relationship with Facebook!! It is what it is! 🙂
- Then you have the ones who check in every now and then… you will see their best pictures when they celebrate the holidays or go on vacation, but the rest of their lives is fairly silent. Hey, at least they check in occasionally, right?
- You do sometimes have the ones who show perfect lives…. their children win everything, they have the amazing house, the beautiful spouse, the perfect job; they become the envy of many who do not truly know them.
- But then you also have the ones who lives are miserable, they only complain (misery loves company), nothing ever seems to go right, they never have money, they hate their jobs (you get the picture).
- And finally, you have the ones who claim they are never on Facebook… yet when you see them in person they can comment on everything you have been doing and ask questions like they just looked at your profile 10 minutes before your conversation. They are the silent stalkers, lol! 🙂
Let’s be honest… at times, we have probably all been each one of these, right?
So here is my question: “Are we being REAL?”
Many times in life I have suffered through depression… and 7 years ago, when my husband walked out the door, I could have easily curled up into a ball on the couch, covered my head and stayed there. I loved the Disney princess movies while growing up, and I do not recall any of those princesses being left alone to raise the children while the prince ran off with another damsel in distress? That just was not part of the “happily every after” ending that we have become so accustomed to in much of we see portrayed in the stories.
To this day, very few of my Facebook friends know what has truly happened to me and my children over the last 7 years… I kept almost all of it off social media; only the few that were closest to me really knew what happened. To be honest, it was actually a real shocker for many people because they only saw the image that I portrayed. Being the perfectionist that I am, I had to make sure the image of my life was so much better than it actually was… even though it was completely crumbling from the inside out.
Things changed for me after July 4, 2009…. okay, let’s be real, EVERYTHING CHANGED!!! My children and I went through hell and back; yet through it all, I learned to truly live and love my life. Now, what you see is truly what you get.
When your spouse leaves you for another married woman twice (and the second time is when you are 4 1/2 months pregnant with child #4), when you lose your house of 12 years (and later a second home of 5 years), when you have to file bankruptcy, when you have to help your 3 teenage children hold their lives together, when you are left with only a part-time job and no degree because you left college to be a mom, when you almost die in childbirth with child #4, when you are both the mother and the father to your children, when you have to go on food stamps for a few years and take the state insurance just so you can literally survive….
Yeah, when that happens, you can choose to live there or fight your way through it and not let it become the chapter that defines your life. (yes I have Rachel Platten’s Fight Song playing through my head right now, lol!)
Again, being real… there were days I could barely breathe. There were moments so painful for us all that it was like a literal knife was piercing our hearts and souls… I was living a life that everyone felt sorry for and no one dared wanted to live. It was hard… it was REALLY hard.
So staying with the theme of “Being Real,” let me just tell you that this journey is one I would not trade… it has completely altered my life in more positive ways than I could ever imagine!!!
I shared with you everything I have lost… now let me share with you what I have gained!!!
A restored relationship between me and God
Incredible relationships with my 4 children (we are truly best friends)
Strength, confidence, maturity, faith, joy, happiness, gratefulness, security, health, success…
New adventures… New career paths… New friendships… New opportunities
A true love for life
A yearning to inspire and help others change their lives
A life lived without fear
A life lived without regrets
A life lived to the fullest
What I thought was the worst curse has turned out to be the biggest blessing! Yes, we were wounded deeply, but we have healed. The scars will always be there, but they will not define us! Our past helps shape us, but we can choose to be any person we want to be going forward!
So if you see me on Facebook and you wonder if what I post is really real… my answer is YES!!! I truly love inspirational quotes that challenge me and others, I truly love that I am able to help people get healthy and take control of their lives both physically and financially, I truly love my flawed, imperfect life that I am privileged to experience each and every day, and I truly love where my future is now going!
Maybe if we will let the outside world see more of our real, inside world, we will discover how much we truly have in common. We are all part of this amazing human race! None of us have perfect lives or perfect relationships and the opposite is true that none of us enjoy staying in misery. At the end of the day, we just want to be loved and accepted by those around us. Please don’t judge a bad season in your life compared to a great season that someone else may be having. We all go through the seasons… some are in winter while others are in summer. Just remember that the seasons are always changing, and there is much beauty to be seen in each and every one of them.
Let’s just remember to keep it real, folks! See you in cyberworld!
May you find the beauty in today,
“He has made everything beautiful in its time” (Ecclesiastes 3:11)
~ Leave me a comment, I would love to read YOUR thoughts~♥